I need a few minutes of your time friends and family, foes and a few I don’t knows, future somethings who currently feel like nothings.
Let’s discuss the darkness and try to shed a lil light on a few things I hope most of you won’t have to wish you already knew.
See I have come to realize that I am entirely direly creeping closer to my expiry.
What??? I know right?!?
Well the truth is the people who always seem so selfless, the ones who care more than any one cares to.
Crackin’ jokes bout themselves when they have to, if that’s what it takes to pull a smile out of you.
The ones who seemingly never have a bad day or just can’t keep a smile off their face.
These are the ones ready to come undone, on the brink of the discovery of the age old question, is there life after.
These people, my people they smile for you cuz they don’t ever want you to know the depths of the pain like they do.
They don’t want you to see how low or worthless they feel cuz empathy runs FAR to deeply in them and they can’t imagine moving any of that weight onto you.
Goin’ ’round crackin’ jokes pickin up people’s hope, the cost is merely a few more pounds on my coat.
That heart on my sleeve never stops beating or growing.
That pain that you got, it keeps overflowing, worry not tho I’ll clean it up without you even knowing.
My true sadness never showing.
When Robin Williams took his own life, I’ll tell you right now I was so fucking mad.
Not for the fact that I never got to meet him or any other obscurity.
I only got mad ‘cuz of my own insecurities, I got mad ‘cuz deep down I was afraid.
Completely terrified that I too one day may take a life that is so unfair and unkind to take.
Make no mistake, I’m not seeking attention, not by any means.
Those of you who know me, know full well how easily and happily I will cause a scene.
No, I’m not seeking attention, I don’t want you to worry ’bout me at all.
I ask instead that you pay attention to those who surround you, who always seem so upbeat, so seemingly complete.
The ones who can always make u smile when all you want to do is break down n cry.
The ones who never need cheering up yet they keep cheering you on.
Please reach out to them if they suddenly become silent or for days just randomly are gone.
Sleep is a great escape, don’t wanna be sad so in bed instead I’ll stay.
I tell you all of this in hopes we can help those who try so hard to go unseen.
So that maybe tomorrow we can all find a way to help ensure we won’t lose another soul who’s anything like me.